You stand there in the doorway the way you always do, right leg crossed over in front of your left, leaning to the right, your right arm raised, resting your head in the inside of your elbow, with that silly little smile of yours.  That’s how I’ll always remember you.  That’s how I love you, but not like this.

     You sit there in the chair, feet firmly planted on the ground, leaning over with your head bowed down and your hands folded to your forehead, as if you were praying, but praying is the last thing on your mind now.  This is not how I want to think of you.  No, not this.

     We’re on a train.  You on the right and me on the left.  You got the window seat after we fought over who would get it, though only playfully, because I know that you know all I want is for you to be happy.  You look out the window, chin rested on your fist.  Your other arm is wrapped around me as I lean over to you, resting in your embrace.  I could lie here forever, just you and me, but that’s not what life have destined for us, for you.

     We’re in a room, that room.  We’re in that room again.  I know you loathe that room, and for that, I loathe that room too.  You’re not wearing what you normally do, but in that blue robe, you look beautiful, stunning, amazing.  Yes, even in that blue robe you make my world go crazy.  I’m crazy for you, but that’s not what life has destined for us, for you.

     Get these voices out of my head.  All I hear is white noise, mumbled speech, as all these people are touching me all over, putting their hands on my shoulder, back, head, touching me all over.  I don’t understand what they’re saying, and I don’t want to.  All I want is to hear your voice, but where are you?

     Got your voice in my head.  I hear you.  I can’t help but smile.  There you are.  In the corner of my eye, I see you.  I quickly turn around.  Blink, and you’re gone.  Where did you go?  I could have sworn I saw you there.  No, that’s right, you couldn’t have been here.  All I want is to see your face, but where are you?

     I close your eyes and whisper a sweet good night in your ear.  I tuck you in and make sure you’re nice and warm on this..in this..bed.  I want to stay here with you, lie here with you, sleep here with you, but I can’t.  I can’t do that.  You wouldn’t want that anyway.

     I close my eyes and suddenly, there you are!  I hear your voice is in my ear, feel your arms around my shoulders, smell your scent envelop me.  Here, we can stay for as long as we want.  We can lie here together.  We can fall asleep in each other’s arms, like we always do.  This I can do.  We can do this.  That’s all we could ever want.

     Blink, and I’m gone.  But..am I really?  I’m here with you.  Now I’m here with you for good.  Now I’m here with you to stay.  I shut my eyes and tell myself to wake up.  This is all just a dream.  But then I feel your hand upon my face, gently caressing it as only you can do.  I open my eyes.  There you are.  This is how I will always love you, just like this.  This is what’s been destined for you, for me, for us.  All I could want is you, and here you are.  That’s all we could ever want: each other, just one more time.

     Don’t blink.  There’s no need to anymore.  We’re home.

(Source: vfung921)